83 Comments

Wow, I'm sorry you had to go through that. Here's a de-escalation technique that I've used in similar situations that sometimes works. Whatever the agressors beef is, I say this: "Dude, I've got a serious question for you. What's your favorite dinosaur?" This total non-sequiter often throws a person out of their immediate rage cycle. A lot of times I get a "why the fuck do you want to know that?" and I meekly say, "I'm curious, I ask everybody that." This gets the initial rager thinking that I'm crazy (but non-confrontational) and often they answer by naming a dinosaur. Whatever they say, I respond with "That's a good one" and say "Mine's a pteranodon, 'cause they could fly." In a situation like a crowded bus, you can get the whole crowd discussing dinosaurs sometimes.

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This is genius (and hysterical), Kent.

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YOU could get the whole situation diffused, but not sure I myself would like to try that. Very clever. I'd love to see you in action!

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Good suggestion and cheaper than the cannabis Rx.

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

Welcome to the world of public transit.

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Thanks for the sympathy,Darin. I will adapt!

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

Think of it like a low cover-charge nightclub. The fare you pay keeps the riff-raff off the bus.

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Yeah, I am not seeing this metaphor. ha ha ha

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Is this irony? 😅 Or do you have much higher bus fares where you are and a higher bar for defining riff-raff 😂

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

Good grief. That's a lesson. I was hoping for a solution to people who are irrational and explosive. But no. I wish there was a tool or a magic word.

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Thanks, Vikki. The entire city is looking for a solution to helping the misplaced mental cases in our town ( state , country) . I don't think I can solve it. But I can work around it.

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Such is life on the Santa Cruz bus line. A friend of mine back in the 80s was a Santa Cruz bus driver. Boy, did he have tales to tell. Every day! Good thing (or maybe not) he was a concert pianist who could escape to his piano. The tragedy there is that he was a concert pianist making a living as a bus driver on a Santa Cruz bus. Sharron, you will have endless inspiration for stories. I can't wait to read them.

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Yes. There is always that. I will carry a notebook when I ride the Metro. Thanks, Sue.

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

I stopped riding public transportation when COVID hit. Occurrences like this are why. I imagine things have gotten even worse in every city. Things like this don’t make the nightly news, but they can ruin one’s day.

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Yes, they could. Best to just stay quiet and listen, listen listen. There are potential stories everywhere. Fortunately I don't go out much...

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

I once asked my brother, a truck driver, if he ever thought about driving a bus for Greyhound. I’ll never forget his answer. He said, “You gotta know what to do when--not if--when some passenger decides to go ballistic on your ass while you’re driving down the road.”

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Greyhound, too? Jeeez. I wonder if any of them arm themselves. Those are long hauls and in the middle of the night.

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

My little town has no busses, no taxis, no uber. Sounds like that's a good thing. Take your own car or bike or walk. Its 4 miles to town and 5 miles to the other side. Stay home if there's 2foot snow.

That DID sound a bit like school bus back in the 50s.

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It is definitely harder there to give up driving, unless you have a friend who can drive you. As I am pretty sure you do. Lucky girl.

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

Oh, please call us to see if we are free to drive you next time, Sharron! This was horrific!

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Nah. Mostly just loud and sad. So much mental illness and desperation on the streets. But I may take you up on a ride sometime! Thanks, neighbor.

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

Yikes, mobile psych ward is right! Aye, I m sorry you had to experience that on your first day, good decision to get off as soon as you could. The upside, maybe, is you will have some good fodder to write about. :)

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Exactly so, Elle. There are stories EVERYWHERE! I will just put on my big-girl pants and get out there!

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Yeah without the language, there’s no story. Glad I am several hundred miles away from riding NYC transit.

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Right you are. Where are you - Canada?

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I wonder what the motivation of the dirty T-shirt guy was. Was he trying to be the hero? Or was he just another angry person looking for trouble?

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Who knows if either of them had motivation. I believe they were both transient mental cases who were stuck in the "paranoia and rage" modes. It may be more common that I imagine. They need transportation too.

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

I love the line “I feel like I am locked in a mobile psych ward”!😍 Uncharacteristically I’m feeling Pollyanna-ish reading this, because I kept hoping someone on the bus with a “Love is always the answer” mindset would casually go up to one of the men and then the other, and unobtrusively hand each one a twenty dollar bill and say, “You’re having a hard day, buy yourself a treat, an ice cream cone solves everything.” Or am I the crazy one 😅

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May I amend my stupid line “An ice cream cone solves everything”. These guys have more problems than even a competent social worker can probably solve. Mental health, to start with... and poverty, and unknown deprivations, and who knows what is in their pasts...

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Yes, surely. But ice cream is always MY first solution as well, Karen. For every ill. And if it is not effective, well, at least there was ice cream.

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Ha! 😍 I’ve recently discovered ice cream made with coconut milk, instead of dairy. It is YUM!!! 😋

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Yes. This is the kind of solution we hope for. Give these lost souls any comfort we can. But sometimes it back fires. I saw a man sitting on the sidewalk a couple of years ago, barefoot, feet in terrible condition. My heart went out to him and I offered to buy him some shoes and socks. He told me to go fuck myself.... ( his language, not mine). I am sorry to say that response makes me reconsider now anytime I feel like offering help...

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

Welcome to the public jungle, where broken lives have only cursing to ease their situation and is but a short step away from violence. That's a big step going car free, Sharron. You don't need a prescription for cannabis anymore... : )

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You are such a kind, rational man, James Ron. You see the situation exactly. Thanks for the reminder about the legality of cannabis. It has been so long since I wanted any... I have a couple of friends with bowls of "gummies" on their coffee tables, as if they were jelly beans or lemon drops...

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Things like this happen in Canada as well. There was one case where a similar situation ended in murder because one of the men had a machete and cut the other guy's head off...

No situation like this has happened when I have used the bus, but I tend to use it during the day. It's usually during the night that anything similar to this happens.

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Cripes, David. Now you got my attention. I do hope this was an anomaly.

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Wow! You are brave! Your story reminds me of confrontations in high school where the two facing off were on the brink of getting physical and didn't want to get there, so they resorted to verbal abuse. Also, you should be able to get cannabis without a prescription.

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Not brave, Caro, but I DO know when to keep my head down and shut the fuck up... Regarding the cannabis: I was just kidding. I am too old now and squirrel-brained to do that and go out in public. Reminds me of two California friends. One says: "Finally! Now I can smoke my marijuana anytime and anywhere I like!" His buddy says, "Wait a minute! Pot was illegal?"

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It is. Winnipeg murders typically tend to be simple stabbings.

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Oh. That's a relief.

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Jan 31Liked by Sharron Bassano

Oooooh man, I'm so sorry this was your FIRST day!!! Talk about regretting life choices! That experience is unreal, I would have gotten off many stops before you did. I'd have been way too afraid of what might have developed.

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Well, that was just one ride and may have just been bad luck. I will continue the research...and bring my notebook with me.

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