26 Comments
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June 17, 2023
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I am so glad you are reading this series, Mitchell. I have never traveled in the south or in Florida. I am sure I am either missing the mark or over-doing it in places, but it is fun imagining travel with these two friends. Both are so opposite from myself.

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This gets better and better. I'll be there for the 2:30 show and beyond! I'm liking the subtle references to how the relationship between the two women is developing. The "motherly" gaze and Marla with the new clothes and bringing "breakfast to Haylene who may need a little pampering this morning.

I HAVE to say that the audio reading was wonderful--it really brought the story to life with the tone and the pacing. Well done!!

And thanks for the shoutout. You are very kind Sharron.

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This was fun to put together. Not sure who or what I was channeling. Thanks for your important suggestion! It helped me step back and reassess. And I am sincere about your clever, thoughtful story telling. I hope more people find you in this vast ocean of WORDS.

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Sooooooo good, Sharron! Tickets to the SHOW - I wasn't expecting that ending...!!!

"My Sharona was throbbing from the speakers like a hangover." LOVED this!

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I have to confess, parts of this appeared like "automatic" writing. I don't know where half of it came from... surely not out of my own ... ahem... experience.

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🤣 Once that writing bug bites, Sharron, you've got to scratch that itch! I really enjoyed your story.

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Yay! I feel part three creeping into my head...

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Love it, wanna' hear more.

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Thanks Gulch Boy. Working on it.

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Come on up and see me sometime. hehehehehe

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Who IS that Haylene, anyway? I don't think I ever met her. Yikes! Maybe she is my own alter ego...

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"his middle name was Lucky." "Miramar Notel." "Her mouth felt like she had swallowed an owl and her hair looked like it had been struck by lightning." Terrific.

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Yeeeow! Thanks a lot!. And, by the way, Leba would have liked you too! She was a terrible flirt! Not as wild as Haylene, but definitely a flirt even into her 90s.

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Like the voiceover. Please continue doing them!

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Thanks, James. I had fun giving it a try. If I try it again, I hope I can lessen the extraneous noise. I had no idea how sensitive the microphone was. YOU should try it. I would love to hear your voice.

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It does take some getting used to. I've been thinking I would. It's a great addition to a story. Thanks!

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That's great! Love your descriptors-'cat about to be stuffed into a pillowcase'! Didn't listen to the audio yet. Your pics really add to the story.

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Thanks, JM! Glad you liked it. I hope you'll check out part 1 to see how these two women hooked up. I am mulling over what comes next for them...

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you know I already checked out part one; I'm paying attention!

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Ha ha ha! Well, I am glad SOMEONE is! I don't know where I am half the time, JM. Muddling along.

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Loved the story and loved the voiceover. You should keep doing them! My goodness I just finished an audiobook the other day and you would have been a far better narrator/reader! Just saying.

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The voice over was a little rough. I am still figuring out the process. If I do it again, I will not move a muscle. Glad you liked these two women's road trip. More soon, I hope...

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Love your little phrases like 'dill his pickle' and 'swallowed an owl'. I'm no expert but I think you tend to switch points of view a lot and tell people what's going on rather than showing them. E.G., that loser in the bar thought he was going to get lucky but you told us rather than showing us. Hope you don't mind my unqualified advice. Stories were great!

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Thank you for this comment, Stu. You are absolutely correct. I try very hard to keep my own comments and opinions out of the story, but I am not always successful. It is a failing I have yet to conquer. ( Feel free to point it out to me anytime. It helps! ) Thanks so much for reading and for your new subscription!

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Sharron, you can most definitely tell a great tale!!!

Thank you,

Debbi

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Hah! Thanks Deb, for going back into Haylene and Marla's archive. I admit I like these two women. They have a hell of a good time together and balance each other out. Always good for a laugh, I think.

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